A Pile of Dog Bones


“In each of us two natures are at war… the good and the evil. All our lives the fight goes on between them, but one of them must conquer. In our own hands lies the power to choose. What we want most to be we are.” – Dr. Henry Jekyll

Friday, June 30, 2006

Honoring Thy Tenant and Landlords and The Friday Drama Update

Well it's Friday again!!! So it is now time to honor my tenant RevRee who is also leaving. I appreciate Rev's staying here while I was feeling meh. I think it was good to have someone else who shows the peace and love so well entertain you all. So thanks RevRee... and come again!

This week I had a few nice people who took me in, so I'd like to pay homage to Slightly Drunk, my former roomie here at APODB Noi Rocker at Voicing My Thoughts!, and none other than Gidget Bones' hubby Dark Marcy. Thanks for giving me a place to rest my paws this week!!!

.:*:.

Now onto the Friday Drama Update that no one reads or cares about but me... so The Nick's Canadian friend came in for a visit. Apparently this SO upset The Nick's world that she forgot to tell me that Mel's baby shower was Saturday... so I missed it. Sunday night I went to dinner with The Nick, The Canuck, and The Steff. We went to a local brick-oven pizza restaurant that we all pretty much enjoy. Afterwards we went and hung out at The Steff's house where one of the things we joked about was what if The Canuck missed her train?

Let's face it... The Nick is not the most ontime person. In fact... she's downright late everywhere she goes. This has become the norm for her... and for someone who is ontime or early to everything I do (well just about) it drives me insane. So we were joking about what would happen if The Canuck missed the train... like what kind of job would she be able to do... what kind of life she would be able to lead... and all I'm thinking in the back of my mind is it'll be one more illegal for me to call INS on.

So guess what? Yeah... The Canuck missed her train Wednesday. So on the way to the dentist I get the text and the question What do I do now? My answer was... plane. Cold hearted? Maybe... but hey... I was on the way to the dentist. Of course what complicates this all was The Nick had to work that night... and I felt an imminent bang out coming. Had it happened... I would have lost my mind. Aside from being short staffed as it is... I was at the dentist that day before work for pete's sake!!! Luckily The Nick found a place for her last night and saw her onto her train Thursday morning.

So did I mention that, aside from loving The Steff to death, The Donkey and I have a few other things in common but not everything. Monday is his birthday and The Steff didn't know what to get him... then she did know what to get him but didn't know how to get it. So yeah... the reason I bid on that signed Axl Rose picture isn't because I suddenly need a picture of him... it was for her to give to him. Hopefully it shows up in time... and if not... well he'll just have to take an IOU. Personally I would ask for something more substantial... like a STFU t-shirt. Tough shit Donkey bitch... but wait til you see what I got ya... hehehehehe.

In addition, there's news on the Zooted and Polluted front. Well... she isn't graduating this month. She'll have to wait until August after summer school. I think I'm going to have to threaten to break her legs if she doesn't pass... then again that won't do much good... I'll have to threaten to break her bong.

That pretty much wraps it up. Well for those of you with lives and are going away, or are already on vacation this weekend, enjoy it. At some point when you have a cold one in hand, hoist it into the air, and in the finest tradition of Death's Destruction give me the official toast... "Here's to NYC Watchdog sitting alone at APODB... sucking my dick."
Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 6/30/2006 11:04:00 AM :: :: 3 Bones Added to the Pile

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Wednesday, June 28, 2006

FOAD Thursday

Today is Fuck Off And Die Thursday.

Normally I would rant and rave. Today, perhaps because I am still feeling meh, I will not be scorching the objects of my pent up emotions in my normal tiradic style.

Instead I would like to say to any of you who offer your services online, and collect a fee, that even though your daily transactions may primarily be through electronic means it does not mean you are above customer service. In fact, if anything, you should be providing the best customer service because your competition is just a click away. I realize that there is life beyond the Internet, that this is more than likely a part-time or perdiem gig for you, and that my needs are probably not even cracking your top 100. However you certainly have received the benefits of it but yet to deliver on any of the promises. So for those of you who pretend to be a business or an associate of such a business, collect real money, make commitments and break them without an explanation, and see nothing wrong with this please fuck off and die... but only after refunding me my money.

I would also like to tell the guys who are fixing my computer to FOAD. Yes... I am currently on a different PC than normal due to a serious viral infection. Of course the fucktards fixing it aren't done. So I still need to use this sluggish crap running Windows 74. FOAD little PC repairman... and if my box isn't back by tomorrow I'm smashing your little black and white bug's windows in.

I would also like to offer peace and love to those of you who hate me and refuse to send me hate mail so I can maul you in my jaws. Please e-mail me all the hatred you feel when reading my blog and the thousand and one things I may have offended you with.

I still feel meh. This is a sucky FOAD. As an FOAD finale... I want to tell myself to FOAD for posting this dribble in the interest of getting sleep.

Go see her... hopefully she isn't feeling meh.

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Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 6/28/2006 11:04:00 PM :: :: 8 Bones Added to the Pile

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Tuesday, June 27, 2006

2,996 Needs You


D. Challenger Roe is organizing a tribute to the victims of 9/11. He is in need of bloggers willing to blog about a victim of the attacks on the upcoming 5th Anniversary. Please go to his blog and consider signing up for it. I think it is a very good way for the blogosphere to remember. Thanks.
Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 6/27/2006 09:46:00 PM :: :: 4 Bones Added to the Pile

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Monday, June 26, 2006

Feeling Meh

It started yesterday. I just have been feeling meh. Normally I would say blah, but meh seems to be the blah of the blogosphere. I had another doctor's visit, and everything looks good on paper... so the infection continues its retreat under the assault of Amoxicillin... so it isn't that.

Pudding used to swear that towards the end of the month I would become hormonally unbalanced, emotional, moody, and basically have what she would have at the beginning of the month. That could be it. It's also coming up on that time of year I dread. When everyone is smiles and happy and they want you to be happy too... but your miserable because you know that you just wasted 365 days of your life you will NEVER get back.

So I feel meh. What makes me feel even more meh is that I learned today that they are making DragonLance Chronicles into a movie. I should be jumping up and down for joy... but I'm not. It's going to be animated. You would think they would have learned their lesson with that after that animated Hobbit from the 1970s.

I should be foaming at the mouth and in a serious tizzy. Dragonlance is my most beloved gaming world of all. While I've always wanted to write a novel in the MechWarrior Universe... my life would be complete if I could do it for Dragonlance. Nothing officila has been announced, but apparently Lucy Lawless leaked she is the voice of Goldmoon. The desecration of my sacred texts is evidently imminent... so this makes me feel even more meh.

Making me even more meh are the changes at Wizkids, the current licence holders for MechWarrior. It seems the organization has been "re-organized" by parent company Topps. This has included the lay offs of Jordan Weisman, who created the Battletech Universe which MechWarrior is based on, and Kevin Goddard who was the MechWarrior brand manager. I am really sad about this... Kevin did me a serious solid while I was freelancing for Scrye by sending me stats on one of the sets before release... and he was kind enough to send me an e-mail about all the writing I had done on MechWarrior and how he was very happy about it. What makes it worse is he has a newborn in the house. Seeing his position, and knowing my own precarious standing, well that makes me feel even more meh.

I know... I'm a dork, dink, and geek to the tenth power. In fact this entire post is meh. Go see her. She isn't feeling meh.
Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 6/26/2006 11:02:00 PM :: :: 3 Bones Added to the Pile

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Sunday, June 25, 2006

Ooogle Monday

It's that time again!!! That's right... it's Ooogle Monday!!! However... this will be a VERY special Ooogle this week in honor of those who can be mature enough and open minded enough to be pro-cartoon bloggers...
Grrrrr... and now for the ladies... a very good friend of mine...

Not satisfied? Go here to be satisfied. Have a good week!
Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 6/25/2006 11:32:00 PM :: :: 6 Bones Added to the Pile

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I Just Love This Video

I seriously love this video. It's done by Mike O'Connell and features this little guy Yoshido. Send the pappooses out of the room before hitting play...



So what's it gonna be???
Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 6/25/2006 01:25:00 PM :: :: 3 Bones Added to the Pile

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Saturday, June 24, 2006

Mussolini Alive and Well in Italy

An Italian court has just convicted Roberto Mancini for "his bad language" on a US hosted blog. The court also held him responsible for comments left on his blog by others. This conviction is definately a step in the wrong direction for the international blogosphere. Normally something like this would receive a tirade of epitaphs that would undoubtedly land me a solid 20 years of community service in Vatican City cleaning the Pope's pipes.

In the interest of keeping diplomatic communications with the Spaghetti-O Nation open, I will however refrain from speaking anything and instead allow *COUGH* my *COUGH* Commander-In-Chief say it for me.

Peace and love...


Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 6/24/2006 11:14:00 PM :: :: 4 Bones Added to the Pile

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50 Questions...

So Lysie tagged me with this meme... and I do kinda like these... so here it is...

1. What curse word do you use the most? Fuck
2. Do you own an iPod? Nope... I'm not kewl enough
3. Who on your MySpace “Top 8” do you talk to the most? The Steff.
4. What time is your alarm clock set for? My alarm clock is my mother... whatever she is set to +15 minutes
5. What color is your room? White
6. Flip flops or sneakers? Neither... Timberland Boots 14 holes... 24/7 365
7. Would you rather take the picture or be in the picture? Take it... although lately I've been noticing I have like NO pictures of me... so maybe I should change that eh?
8. What was the last movie you watched? Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith for the 63rd time... only three more times to my "Order 66" party!!!
9. Do any of your friends have children? Yeah... me
10. Has anyone ever called you lazy? Yes... but I'm too lazy to list them all
11. Do you ever take medication to help you fall asleep faster? Sometimes... but especially after the dentist
12. What CD is currently in your CD player? Therapy?'s Troublegum... I love that CD
13. Do you prefer regular or chocolate milk? Chocolate milk
14. Has anyone told you a secret this week? Nope
15. Have you ever given someone a hickey? Multiple times... in multiple places... on multiple occasions
16. Who was the last person to call you? The Steff
17. Do you think people talk about you behind your back? Well if they didn't I'd be upset... I must be boring or something
18. Did you watch cartoons as a child? Yabba-dabba do... which is why I think I have a thing for redheads
19. How many siblings do you have? 1... but he's like having 9
20. Are you shy around the opposite sex? I can be depending on the situation
21. What movie do you know every line to? Pump Up The Volume
22. Do you own any band t-shirts? A ton... most of them are actual concert tees though with dates... I love them... especially my Warped Tour collection
23. What is your favorite salad dressing? Russian
24. Do you read for fun? Yes
25. Do you cry a lot? Never... unfortunately
26. Who was the last person to text message you? The Nick and her "Whatcha doin?"
27. Do you have a desktop computer or a laptop? Desktop
28. Are you currently wanting any piercings or tattoo? One tattoo I've had on the drawing board for 5 years... but I want a certain artist to do it... soon... very soon... and another I don't care who does it but it'll probably get done before the other one
29. What is the weather like? Raining... thunderstorms... lightning... oh my
30. Would you ever date someone covered in tattoos? Sure... the more the merrier
31. Is sex before marriage wrong? I'm already going to hell for other things... so I hope not
32. When was the last time you slept on the floor? Wow... probably only about four weeks ago... it was just so damn comfy
33. How many hours of sleep do you need to function? 4
34. Are you in love or lust? Sure to both... Keira Knightley's coming out in that movie soon enough...
35. Are your days full and fast-paced? Full yes... fast paced I wish
36. Do you pay attention to calories on the back of packages? Never
37. How old will you be turning on your next birthday? 224... I am fucking old
38. Are you picky about spelling and grammar? Spelling yes... grammar no
39. Have you ever been to Six Flags? Many times
40. Do you get along better with the same or opposite sex? Depends on the person... but I have more girls who I consider friends than guys
41. Do you like cottage cheese? I may be old... but I'm not THAT old
42. Do you sleep on your side, tummy, or back? Tummy and proud
43. Have you ever bid for something on eBay? Yep... in fact I'm bidding on a vibrating sexual aide right now... it's a Jenna Jameson original!
44. Do you enjoy giving hugs? Oh hell yes... nice... long... bear like hugs...
45. What song did you last sing out loud? Bring the Noise by Public Enemy
46. What is your favorite TV show? Right now is World Poker Tour
47. Which celebrity, dead or alive, would you want to have lunch with? Keira Knightley... and I want her for dessert
48. Last time you had butterflies in your stomach? The first night I spent in New Orleans after Katrina... it was a week after the Hurricane but darker than anything I've ever seen before
49. What one thing do you wish you had? The winning lotto ticket
50. Favorite lyrics? Black by Pearl Jam

So for shits and giggles... well I'll tag... Some Girl, Cat, and Miss Ann. No pressure now... and I would have tagged T but just finding out what was in her purse was like pulling teeth from an alligator.
Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 6/24/2006 11:45:00 AM :: :: 3 Bones Added to the Pile

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Friday, June 23, 2006

The New Renter and Hate

So as I mentioned before... this week I am renting to RevRee from the suitably titled The Life And Times of RevRee. It really wasn't a hard choice... in fact we kinda set it up beforehand which is something I NEVER do. While I tend to rent to blogs I've read for awhile... well I also believe I should broaden my horizons.

Her blog is aesthetically white... and what got me was that she did a post how no one was renting to her... and so she decided to show some Peace and Love. Now everyone knows that Peace and Love are quite possibly my two favorite things in the whole world... so anyone willing to spread it gets a vote in my book. Her blog to be honest is quite interesting. She has some pretty pictures for you to look at, some interesting stories, a bitchy little streak, and is a relative No0b to the BE experience. To top it ALL off... when she rants she even threatens to beat the shit out of you with a baseball bat!!! So she probably knows a cousing of my own Uncle Louiseville!!! For some reason... she reminds me of... well... me. So go check her out... and make her experience here at APODB a good one!

.:*:.

It finally happened. I finally got an e-mail about something I wrote on this blog. I always wanted one of those psycho fucktards to send me an e-mail saying how I'm going to hell, or I have a bad attitude, or I must be gay or something. I've always wanted it... so I could be kewl like Ms. Chatty or Bitter Bitch and release the hell hounds from their cages and bring a shitstorm to their life.

But I won't. Alas... this person's e-mail really didn't do any of those. It basically asked me if I hate them. I think hate is a very weak work for a strong emotion. Some things I hate are Al Quaeda, taxes, and the fact Guyana beat the United States in the World Cup. These are all things I can't do a damn thing about.

When someone pisses me off in the physical world I have a few options. I can tell them off, beat the snot out of them (if it's a female send my pack of crazy lesbian dykes after them... yes I keep them on the payroll because believe it or not I will never hit a woman), or do some serious steam blowing off and play some Xbox.

When someone pisses me off here... well I vent about it here. I release it... and with a click of a button... it is gone. I'm not a cool bitchy dude all the time. There are times when I am mellow, and laid back.

It's kinda like what my good friend and amigo Dr. Henry Jeckyll says, “In each of us two natures are at war… the good and the evil. All our lives the fight goes on between them, but one of them must conquer. In our own hands lies the power to choose. What we want most to be we are.”

So be it.

Peace and Love.
Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 6/23/2006 11:15:00 PM :: :: 4 Bones Added to the Pile

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Thursday, June 22, 2006

Honoring They New Tenant, Landlords, and the Friday Drama Update

So it is once again Friday where I Honor Thy Tenant and Thy Landlords. Well I don't have a current Tenant yet... when I do it will be her because no one seems to want to rent to her and I think that's wrong because her blog is pretty cool... and she knows Peace and Love (which by the way got featured here). I do want to say goodbye to Jalapeno Burns. Thanks for the 80's nostalgia and the laughs... and the TUMS. It was a good time. Since I was convalescing... well I didn't stay anywhere else this week. I also didn't really agressively try to rent except from Diner Bitch who still won't rent to me... but that's okay... I'm trying to shed a few pounds and staying over there for a week with all that souvlaki may be detrimental to that cause.

.:*:.

As for the Drama Update. Well last Saturday The Steff dragged me around with her to the craft store and then we went to Johnny Rockets (fucking yum). We picked up a scrapbook and some stuff at the craft store. Luckily they had those safety scissors for her just in case... The Steff is a blonde at heart don't ya know? Then I showed her how to do the whole Snapfish thing so she could get the prints of her photos for the scrapbook.

Monday we had lunch at the diner before she took me to the doctor's to get cleared. She was telling me about how The Donkey got sea sick when her father broke the reefs on Sunday while fishing. Nothing like making your boyfriend puke his guts out right? Donkey's and water just don't mix. She took me to the doctor, and then for my blood work right after. She's been the absolute greatest while I've been under the weather getting me out of the house and bringing me Ice Coffee. One of the things I have to love and adore about The Steff is that she's there when I need her... but she also knows when to leave me be.

Wednesday night when I was talking to her on the phone she was cleaning while The Donkey was on her laptop. She made mention that the photos had arrived and she wanted to do the scrapbook... but she didn't want to do it alone. Uh-oh. He's right fucking there. Now I could have signed on and quietly IMed The Donkey to put that shit away and go scrapbooking... but instead I told her to tell him to get the fuck off the computer and spend some time with her. At some point she needs to learn to open her mouth and say what's on her mind... especially since if she becomes miserable I'm breaking his legs.

On The Nick front, well her best Jamaican/Canadian friend is coming to New York tonight. She has this whole itinerary planned out... which includes various hot spots around the city and touristy things to do. There has been no mention of Musclehead/Goldberg... although she has been relatively friendly with some cop she met sometime last week when she was supposedly on her way to visit me in the hospital. But hey... she did get me a Cookies'N'Cream Ice Cream Cake from Baskin Robbins... so all is forgiven.

The Ooompa Loompas have apparently dropped off the face of the planet. Not sure what's going on with them... and The Southern Hellcat has once again resurfaced from the void insisting that we go to the movies this weekend. I have better things to do... like hanging out with a recent pre-school graduate and seeing Cars... probably with Christine and her daughter. So I guess you can say I'm going on a double date...

.:*:.

For a bit of closure to yesterdays FOAD... well the showdown at the BOTB Corral happened...

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us
Here are the results...
Results of the Showdown on BOTB for ALL of 'Toon kind
And THAT win is for bloggers who use 'Toons everywhere!!!
Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 6/22/2006 11:26:00 PM :: :: 7 Bones Added to the Pile

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The 250th Bone on FOAD Thursday... How Fitting

This is the 250th post, or bone as I like to refer to them as, here on this blog APODB. The post I had planned out in excruciating detail will have to wait. A hint can be found in my new e-mail address... but that is all... and I will not mention it again until it happens because it still will and you should know it when you see it.

Today is also Fuck Off And Die Thursday. How appropriate to have FOAD land on the 250th post. Over these few months I tend to think I've pissed off a few people, made some enemies who view me as the bane of their existence, and exposed fakes and fools for what they are. With that in mind, I shall continue this tradition by doing something I've not done before. Drumroll please... I shall set on fire with a blogging barrage a commenter who left a comment here on this blog.

On my last post I received a comment from Mr. AC/DC, which is not his true Blogging identity but I am not the swiftest knife in the drawer as I have admitted numerous times and Miss Ann Thrope pointed out that he is in fact using a warped version of her name... so I shan't say the name lest I be struck down by lightning for blasphemy.

So here is his comment:
I am indeed flattered that you read my blog. While I don't agree with your personal attack tactics, I can at least tell you try and follow a train of logic. Nonetheless, I must take issue with a few things:
Now this kind of threw me for a loop. Seriously. He was flattered I read his blog? Why the fuck should the fact I read his blog be FLATTERING??? Dude, I called you a fucktard and you're flattered. Hold on... let me turn around so you can just suck it ok? Really now... personal attack tactics? I don't see it in that post. In fact, on a few points I agreed with you. I mean if you want personal attack... ok... it's coming. As for following the train of logic... I don't follow the train... I drive it with one of those striped black and white hats and the red doo-rag tied around my neck. Of course you're going to take issue with a few things... which is why it's your bloody ass tied down to the rails my train is barreling down on. Scream like a bitch... there's no white hatted hero in your near future... we're both on Blogger so if it goes down... we go down with her.
1. My toon criticism was directed at those who have toons without a real pic of themselves. I am still convinced that, more often than not, this points to an uggo. I know firsthand that this isn't always the case, but my point is still valid.
Well since you know first hand that this isn't always the case, you just invalidated your point. Define Uggo? What you find attractive and unattractive is not for you to determine for anyone except yourself. Beauty is in the eye of the Beholder.
2. As for my opinion on blogging and shyness, I stick by it. You have expressed a differing opinion and that's cool. However, just because it's your opinion and not mine, it doesn't definitionally become truth.
Your opinion is your opinion. However the fact that I know firsthand the benefits of blogging for stutterers, shy people, and the other socially challenged make it truth. I am a stutterer. I have no problem admitting that, and although I went through 8 years of speech therapy and there is hardly a trace there... well I know how it feels. The social interaction on here may be in small steps... but its steps in the right direction. To turn around and berate someone (Slumlord Scottage of all the people... I still can't believe I'm trying to defend him) who is shy, which is what you did, is wrong. That's like me berating you for being a retired Air Force Officer. Jihad got you scared? What, you couldn't drop the bomb on the target? Oh you right... don't ask don't tell.
3. Your attempt to posit that blogs are complete chaos with no norms or general patterns is, in my opinion, horseshit. If there were no minimal set of expectations regarding blogs and blogging, no one would know a blog when they saw one. And your comparisions to magazines, paper journals, and Revolutionary War era documents could use some work in the area of relevance.
Oh sweet Joshua. Blogs are not complete chaos without norms or general patterns. The BLOGOSPHERE is. The types of blogs range from everything like Gawker to the mommy blog to the Bitch blog to the Photo blog to the Tech blog and even all the way to the Fucktard blog. I even remember there being a blog about a pet rat somewhere. The BLOGOSPHERE is in chaos... but in chaos there is order. It's this little thing called Chaos Theory. My comparisons were in reference to the book called Blog! by Dave Kline and Dan Burnstein. They are arguing that Thomas Paine was a proto-blogger who used pamphlets instead of Blogger. Go read it... your wacky like that... believing that there is a "tradition" to blogging.
4. D&D - Why should I have to find some obscure reference, when D&D makes the point I'm going for just fine? Get over your sensitivity.
I am sensitive when it comes to the casual referal of Role Playing Games as Dungeouns & Dragons. I worked in the industry... and the mass media along with yourself make the assumption that if it has to do with Fantasy it has to do with D&D and that it is EVIL. Well fuck you and your corporate mongering ways you uneducated doof. There are plenty of other games out there that can be considered way worse... and as I said you were looking for that cheap pop Mick Foley style. You got your pop. I called you on it. Deal.
5. I never said anything whatsoever about aliases. I've never thought of names as a way to seduce others in the blogosphere, but I suppose they could be, but that's not a part of my post.
This is true, you never did say anything about aliases. However aliases and the 'toon characters out there in the basis of their nature are the same. They are representations the blogger has chosen for themselves. The whole thing about seducing other bloggers... both in name or 'toon... well I find that VERY hard to believe. A MySpace denizen... yeah ok... but in general bloggers have more than two brain cells to rub together... even you Mr. AC/DC... even you. So I find the idea a name or 'toon could seduce another blogger a fantasy unto itself... so dream on.
6. Opinions and Fantasies are two very different ideas. I believe that Scottage and I were both talking about Fantasies. Please try to stay with me.
Oh I'm with you... and you're idea that the 'toons create a fantasy world for the blogger is utterly credulous. Each blog is authored from a point of view... which while not necessarily totally historically accurate is their recollection and therefore opinion of the way things happen. A blogger's point of view is different from everyone else's and the emphasis will be on different things which is one of the reasons News Blogs that cover some of the bigger stories can be such interesting reads. Unfortunately we're not talking about News Blogs, we're primarily talking about personal blogs... but if there was one that had a few people blogging about the same experience you would see the differences both small and large. Are they all wrong? Absolutely not... they just walked away with a unique point of view.
7. As I said in my post, fantasy is cool, but I think you owe it to your readers to let them know when you're saying something you know not to be true. It's common decency. I'm not saying you can't be an asshole and lie to your readers, just that it would be cool if you'd treat them with a little respect.
I agree. No reason for me to say I don't agree with you when I do. I think if your going to write a fictionalized post... then do the James Frey disclosure or something. I agree you should try to treat them with a little respect in that department... but you still need to be you irregardless of how it might make them feel. If you end up upsetting them... they can always stop reading.

So Mr. AC/DC, as one of my blogging buds Jane pointed out you admit in your own comments that your post was directed to the "BlogExplosion hags"... meaning you were only directing your criticism at 'toons of women that whooped your ass in BOTB. Well... this proves my point that in the Blogosphere content is not always king... and anytime you want to dance in BOTB with the crazy sexy little guy wearing the red hat up there... oh wait... right... your comments weren't directed at him either because male bloggers using 'toons aren't sexy. *CONFERENCEING WITH MINI-ME* Ok... now he REALLY wants to kick your ass because he's sexy as hell. That and he wants to impress the little chicky he's going out with Friday night. Lord knows he needs to get some... one of us has to... but I digress... bottom line your attitude towards female bloggers sucks. As a leader of a harem I assure you that each and every one of them are beautiful beyond their 'toons... because for me content is Queen. So since today is Thursday and all... FUCK OFF AND DIE Mr. AC/DC and anyone else who thinks a female blogger is an "Uggo" because of their 'toon.

Oh wait... your comments weren't done...
8. Kisses!
9. Ciao
Where I come from we have similar greetings/goodbyes. Only we call them Peace and Love... and here's the universal sign...


That will be all I have to say on this subject anymore.

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Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 6/22/2006 12:18:00 AM :: :: 17 Bones Added to the Pile

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Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Yo estoy un perro loco

The title of this post comes from my favorite blogging chica. We've been hassling each other all day at Did I Say That? after she re-activated me cause I was a bad doggy. If you haven't been to Did I Say That? yet then you really better go... and if your already there... well there are a few new things up you might be interested in.

One of the things I hate about being out of it for a few days is you miss some good posts... like this one over at DC Mr. Anthrope. He followed that post up with this one. Allow me to synopise for those not in a clicky mood... in the first post he basically goes off on all the beautiful female cartoon blog templates out there, basically then says the blogger is probably ugly, but there's nothing wrong with that. Then he rips into GUYS who go comment happy thinking they're looking at a blogger in the 'toon, basically looking for a date. The next post he rips into Slumlord Scottage who commented on the previous post that yeah he flirts because it's fun, and the image is part of who they want to be, and in real life he's shy, blah blah blah. So DC Mr. Anthrope then goes on comparing those blogs to a game of Dungeouns & Dragons and that's not how blogs are traditionally done.

Now see the first post... well I hear ya about those 'toons... alot of them are sexy and designed that way on purpose... but I don't have a problem with that or blame any bloggers who use them. If I had enough gumption I could prove how "pretty" blogs will always get more readers/comments than the "ugly" blogs. In a place where content should be king... well in truth it rarely is. Nor do I fault any guys who drool over the 'toons. In fact... if I was inclined to wack one... I would definately do her... the slutty skin one... see??? She's already in my favorite position, is wearing thigh highs, and she has red hair. It doesn't get much 'toony better than that!

The second post is where my loconess will come out a bit... specifically the part where he says, "Blogging certainly doesn't help someone get over shyness. I'd guess it actually exacerbates shyness." Right. Your guess... and a bad one. For someone who suffers from shyness any social interaction... including Internet interaction is good. While I agree that it should not REPLACE actual physical interaction, it's therapeutic augmentation is nearly priceless for those who stutter or have trouble making eye contact.

However this little gem is what set the Watchdog sirens off:
Second, but relatedly, traditional blogging isn't about fantasy worlds. That's what Dungeons and Dragons is for. I'm not saying you can't write fiction in your blogs, but if you do, you should probably make it clear you're doing so.
Traditional blogging. I'm sorry... are you trying to argue the case those nuts are about how blogging dates back to Thomas Paine and his flyers? Blogging is not in any way shape or form traditional. In fact, if it was traditional, there would be NO blogs whatsoever. Instead we would be writing in notebooks, leather clad journals, or legal pads. Maybe we'd write on plain paper and be going to the copy shop at midnight for the $.09 copies, make a few dozen, and mail them out to friends. Oh shit... wait... there's already something called that... they're called 'Zines.

Fantasy worlds. First, lay the fuck off the D&D reference you unimaginative cretin. D&D is but one game in a genre of hundreds... but you wouldn't know that because you did ZERO research and instead looked for that cheap social pop. So now I want to see your birth certificate... the one that has your name as DC Mr. Anthrope. Yeah... right... 'cause if you really thought my mom named me NYC Watchdog, then your living in your own fantasy world too... roll them D20's and hope you make that saving throw. Fucktard. While I agree with the James Frye clause if your blog is a pure work of fiction... I think it's a safe assumption that for the most part we write under aliases and we write things how we see them, or remember them, which may also be construed as an OPINION... not a fantasy.

Someone said it once... probably on the forum... and if I could remember who it was I would give them credit for it... but let's face it... our personal sections of the blogosphere basically amounts to MySpace for Grownups. The social interaction is limited, there is generally a large degree of creativity taken here, the pics may be that of cartoons but they are enticing eye candy, we have stalkers and trolls, and of course we have fucktards and asshats. I think that's really a great comparison... and find it truer every day.

My point in this... and even though I hate to admit it because I think Slumlord Scottage is one of those fucktards... is that your blog is what you make it. If you want to live out the fantasy of an alter-ego... go right the fuck ahead. If you want to write about politics... go right the fuck ahead. If you want to write about something someone posted you disagree with... go right the fuck ahead. The blogosphere as a whole will be what we all make of it. So make it your best... or worst... but make it yours.
Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 6/20/2006 03:48:00 PM :: :: 15 Bones Added to the Pile

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Monday, June 19, 2006

The Cup Runneth Over in Carolina and Randomness

Congratulations go to the Hurricanes from North Carolina (formerly known as the Hartford Whalers for those who haven't watched the NHL since 1997) and their very first win of Lord Stanley's Cup for the franchise. This series was one of much contention, including tonight's delayed penalty call with 4 seconds left in the first period where a penalty shot should have been awarded, but it was well worth it. While the NY Rangers will always be #1 in my heart... any team named the Hurricanes is okay in my book.

Today was probably the busiest day for me since I've been home. I had lunch with The Steff before she took me to see my doctor for a follow-up visit. Then I had to have her drag me to a diagnostic lab to get blood work done. Once that comes back tomorrow I should be unrestricted from work and able to drive myself around once again. Tonight I watched the aforementioned game with my brother, father, and uncle at my cousin's house. It was a nice little get together of men laying on couches passing potato chip bags through the air. We actually haven't seen my cousin in over a year. He's working private security for a corporation over in Iraq and surprised my uncle with a trip home. He leaves again in two weeks but he says he's getting paid very well which is good for him. It makes Blackwater all that more appealing.

I'd like to make everyone aware of a Blogger Movement meant to honor the victims of September 11, 2001. D.C. Roe is organizing 2,996. Basically if you as a blogger sign up they will give you the name of one of the 2,996 victims of the 9/11 attacks. Then on the 5th Anniversary this year, you will blog about that victim. To be honest... I'm very torn about the whole thing... because while I think the whole thing is a very noble cause... I know quite a few names on that list and it would be hard to ask for only one or for that matter not do any of them. But please check out 2,996 and if you can, I think participating in it is a good thing... just not sure if it's for me.

On a final note... this post will be #257 on this blog... but in reality it's #248 for me because there are 9 posts done on here by other bloggers/tyrants. I had a plan for #250... but I think I have to scrap it for now. Things and timing just haven't worked out. So when #250 comes... well it's going to probably suck... so maybe I won't mention it afterall. I still plan on doing what I originally wanted to do... so figure something very cool will be happening very shortly...
Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 6/19/2006 11:57:00 PM :: :: 1 Bones Added to the Pile

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Sunday, June 18, 2006

Ooogle Monday With A Little FOAD On The Side

I would guess I'm currently operating at roughly 75% capacity right now... so maybe a little Ooogle Monday action can help me out!!! As an ode to my Ubekistan Nurse's Aide who gave me that sponge bath...

Image Hosted by ImageShack.us

... yes fellas... it was worth it. Now for the ladies I figured I would follow the lead of People Magazine who named this guy the most eligible and hottest bachelor...

Soul Patrol

... so those of you who have read me for awhile may be asking "When has NYC Watchdog ever followed anyone else's lead? " Right... especially not those fucktards at People. What the hell do they know? So I am calling upon all the machismo I have in reserve in my name and every other single guy out there who happens to be NORMAL and sending this FOAD to the editorial staff at People responsible for that CRIME...

Hey Hypnotic Specter... stare at this would ya?

But I need to keep my harem happy... and in a conversation earlier this week/weekend... I will admit that this is probably the sexiest guy around and if I were to ever flip that AC/DC switch it would be for him...

The Catcher

... but he's catching. Ya dig? Keep Monday rolling with some laughter from him!
Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 6/18/2006 11:02:00 PM :: :: 6 Bones Added to the Pile

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I Got Tagged!!!

I got tagged by the Rent-My-Blog Queen Kentucky Gurl with the 5 things meme... so here it is...

5 Things in my fridge:

1. Diet Coke
2. Pepto-Bismol (I know... I keep it refrigerated... so sue me k?)
3. Sweet Gerkins Pickles from Heinz
4. A green cake (it was there before I went into the hospital... I think it used to be chocolate)
5. Half a Dunkin Donuts French Vanilla Ice Coffee, light with cream and 4 Splendas

5 Things in my closet:

1. Uniform shirts
2. Uniform pants
3. My camping backpack (packed and ready for deployment... my Scoutmaster would be proud)
4. Three pairs of Timberland boots (two of which have worn through on the sides... but ya never know)
5. A pair of jeans

5 Things in my purse (I'm doing wallet 'cause I don't have a man bag):

1. Current Driver's Licence
2. Expired Driver's Licence
3. A $20 bill
4. My EMT Card
5. My CPR Card

5 Things in my car:

1. Cigarrettes
2. A bottle of Dasani someone gave me
3. A few empty Coke bottles
4. Rescue jacket
5. Dried vomit from when I got sick last week... I really need to clean that up

5 People I am tagging

Everywhere I look... people have been tagged with this already... so if you haven't been tagged and want to be tagged... you're it!!!
Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 6/18/2006 11:01:00 PM :: :: 0 Bones Added to the Pile

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Happy Father's Day P*Star #1879

First Happy Father's Day to my fellow "Daddy" bloggers... and of course to my own father. So here's a quick update on the Poker Tournament... I'm out at #1879 of 2247. Here are my overall stats for the tourney:
During current Hold'em session you were dealt 42 hands and saw flop:
- 2 out of 5 times while in big blind (40%)
- 3 out of 5 times while in small blind (60%)
- 22 out of 32 times in other positions (68%)
- a total of 27 out of 42 (64%)
Pots won at showdown - 3 of 10 (30%)
Pots won without showdown - 5
I know... my showdown ratio was horrid... but it was a very tight playing table with a lot of checking. The guys were cool though... and for a bunch of bloggers it took awhile to get some table chat going... although I tend to think I may have been the only one who was a blogger with more than 2 months going into it. What killed me? The Bitches. No... not those Bitches... the Queen of Hearts and the Queen of Spades.

Here's how the final hand played out for those who care:
PokerStars Game #5292317631: Tournament #25183930, Freeroll Hold'em No Limit - Level III (25/50) - 2006/06/18 - 16:32:46 (ET)
Table '25183930 119' 9-max Seat #6 is the button
Seat 1: C-TUCK-UF (1850 in chips) is sitting out
Seat 2: obsoleet (1760 in chips)
Seat 3: stan21 (3390 in chips)
Seat 4: nycwatchdog (1710 in chips)
Seat 5: Dixon01 (500 in chips)
Seat 6: achengy (2325 in chips)
Seat 7: MonkeyCuffs (2205 in chips)
Seat 8: max1090 (2410 in chips)
Seat 9: lucianoar (1850 in chips) is sitting out
MonkeyCuffs: posts small blind 25
max1090: posts big blind 50
*** HOLE CARDS ***
Dealt to nycwatchdog [Qh Qs]
lucianoar: folds
C-TUCK-UF: folds
obsoleet: calls 50
stan21: calls 50
nycwatchdog: calls 50
Dixon01: folds
achengy: folds
MonkeyCuffs: folds
max1090: checks
*** FLOP *** [2d 4s 6s]
max1090: bets 100
obsoleet said, "you want to do some real saving... go learn some CPR... and keep the souls of your fellow man out of the clutches of the netherworld. F*cktards."
obsoleet: folds
stan21: folds
obsoleet said, "i love that"
nycwatchdog: raises 200 to 300
max1090: raises 750 to 1050 (here is where I should have just laid it down)
nycwatchdog: raises 610 to 1660 and is all-in
max1090: calls 610
*** TURN *** [2d 4s 6s] [Ks]
*** RIVER *** [2d 4s 6s Ks] [3d]
*** SHOW DOWN ***
max1090: shows [2s 2h] (three of a kind, Deuces)
nycwatchdog: shows [Qh Qs] (a pair of Bitches)
obsoleet said, "gg"
nycwatchdog said, "gg"
max1090 collected 3545 from pot
max1090 said, "gg"
*** SUMMARY ***
Total pot 3545 | Rake 0
Board [2d 4s 6s Ks 3d]
Seat 1: C-TUCK-UF folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 2: obsoleet folded on the Flop
Seat 3: stan21 folded on the Flop
Seat 4: nycwatchdog showed [Qh Qs] and lost with a pair of Bitches
Seat 5: Dixon01 folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 6: achengy (button) folded before Flop (didn't bet)
Seat 7: MonkeyCuffs (small blind) folded before Flop
Seat 8: max1090 (big blind) showed [2s 2h] and won (3545) with three of a kind, Deuces
Seat 9: lucianoar folded before Flop (didn't bet)
In hindsight... I should have seen the trips coming... but I didn't. I figured the odds of max1090 having the nut straight was pretty weak... so I came over the top and my Bitches got blasted. Originally I had wanted to end in the top 1,000 which didn't happen. The World Blogger Championship of Online Poker has once again eluded me. My future in poker is grim. Maybe I should just take T on and become Uno Champion of the World. Sounds easier... and cheaper. Now I'm off to a barbecue.
Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 6/18/2006 03:38:00 PM :: :: 2 Bones Added to the Pile

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Friday, June 16, 2006

A Bunch of Randomness

Being an invalid has it's good points and bad points. The good is Pudding had to chaueffer me around today like the good little ex-wife she is. The bad is my leg is throbbing to no end and I need to keep it elevated, meaning the chair needs to lean back, meaning writing today is a real pain in the ass. But here's a bunch of things I need you guys to help me with...

First I want to give my apologies to my former tenant Utenzi who was staying here all alone while I was in the hospital. I always try to make it a good experience for those staying here at APODB... but I wasn't able to give him proper treatment. So please go see Utenzi and send my apologies.

Next is my current renter Jesse Gersten over at Jalapeno Burns. He was the first bidder last night... and since I have very fond memories of Q*Bert, I was like why not? Well not only does he have a cool blog design... but he's funny as all hell... him and The Reese's Peanut Butter Cup Twins. Definately my type of guy. So go see Jesse and let him know that we appreciate laughter being the best medicine.

Next is a big thanks to Izzy, T, and Monique for their lovely and touching e-mails. If anyone has ever questioned whether they have had an effect on someone's life outside of cyber-space... well the proof is in e-mails like those... because my life was definately affected. Also a big thanks to everyone at the forums for their support and messages. Thanks guys for showing da love...

Next is a big old thanks to those who came to visit me in the hospital... and even though maybe only one of them will read this, well it's important to acknowledge your friends... so thanks goes to Christine, The Steff (who as dependable as always snuck me in an Ice Coffee I wasn't supposed to have), The Donkey, and The Terrorist. You guys rule! Of course there's also my mom who was there everyday for me and brought me clothes so I didn't have to wear that hospital gown shit. I heart Mom. You may puke in your buckets now.

Finally a thanks to all those others who called... or more importantly called but didn't push it when they found out where I was. There's nothing worse than getting a phone call in the middle of an IV anti-biotic push. There was a shitload of those people... they know who they are. Work was actually really nice and sent me a nice flower or cactus or something. They're being really great about me being out... well my bosses are... the guys who I work with are begging for me to come back. Not sure what's up with that... since I'm their boss... but whatever... probably Tuesday. The plant thing is really nice though... and so are the balloons.

So your probably all wondering what I've been doing? Well... aside from sitting around in my pajamas with my leg on a chair... I've been doing alot of online poker at PokerStars. This Sunday, Father's Day no less, there is a Free Roll for the World Blogger Championship of Online Poker. Hence why there is a code in the sidebar... so I can be registered. It's been awhile since I played any poker seriously. My training today showed me placing at the final table in 50% of my tourney's. It was an equal mix of 27 and 45 player play money tables. No real cash exchanged today. The grand prize is a seat at the 2006 WSOP. Right now the field stands at around 2200+ strong. If I can make it into the top 1,000 I'll be happy... if I win I'll be ecstatic.

So that's basically where I'm at and what I'm doing. I know... boring as all hell right? Sorry... still not feeling 100%... but hopefully if all goes as actually planned this Monday will be Ooogle Monday!
Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 6/16/2006 11:20:00 PM :: :: 5 Bones Added to the Pile

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Thursday, June 15, 2006

Oh You Didn't Know...

... yeah, I just got out of the hospital. The surprise to end all surprises is that my crappy feeling lately wasn't so much a mental issue but a real physical one. Me, being the good EMT I am, ignored it all and of course I ended up in the hospital delirious with fever and a swollen limb.

So let's start at the beginning... well at least last Friday. I went home Friday night, overdosed on some Ny-Quil and ended up sleeping until 1:00ish on Saturday. I blew The Steff off for an AC Moore run because I was still beat, did some chatting online instead, and took a shower before heading to MSG for Fight Night. When I got out of the shower I had some serious cramps in my left leg and I was feeling all lightheaded and stuff. I shrugged it off to the cold I was coming down with and possibly dehydration. Grabbed a gatorade and a meatball sandwhich and off I went. The meatball sandwhich stayed in my stomach a grand total of 5 minutes before ending up on the passenger seat of the truck. Bad meat. I kept going.

Nevermind the fact that when I got to the base I was exhausted and weak. OPS didn't notice but my wolves in dispatch did... but I kept going. It took me an hour and a half to get to MSG. I was over an hour late, and when I got there it was physically impossible for me to get out of the ambulance. Eventually I hobbled down to the medical office... did 4 hours out of my scheduled 8... and then went home to sleep again.

Sunday my temp was up and down... 101.3... 102.1... 100.7... 1003.9. Yep... I peaked at 103.9, and found myself in an ice tub of cold water to bring the temp down. Of course, I refused to go to the hospital. I had already cancelled out of the ECW PPV at the Manhattan Center so what was the point. It was just a stomach flu right? A couple more gallons of Gatorade and I would be okay like always.

Finally Monday I went to my doctor's office. Monday morning when I tried to get up, I could barely walk. Lifting my left pant leg I caught sight of the problem. Cellulitus. F. U. C. K.

I really didn't need to go to the doctor's office to get told to go to the hospital... but I did it anyway because I was thinking that since Friday there may have been a miracle cure discovered I didn't know about and the doctor I haven't seen in 7 years might have been the one to discover it. Nope. So off to the hospital I went. I had a 102.5 temp upon admission... doplar was good... IV anti-biotics running... percoset was onboard... and I was done.

I'm not going to bore you with the details of my hospital stay, with the mystery meat, the hot Ubekistan Nurse Aide who gave me a sponge bath, the paralysing rounds of IV anti-b's, the obnoxious troll who lied about flippin' my roomy slick Willy, or my other roomy Carl "Cobblestones" O'Hoolihan and his globe trotting family. What I will tell you is I had/have is officially called LYMPHEDEMA CELLULITIS LYMPHANGITIS... and yes... I will live.

I've actually only been home for about 5 hours... and while I see there are 71 e-mails and 237 posts in bloglines to read alone... well... I'll get to it when I can. I just figured I'd leave a quick note to let everyone know that yes I am alive... and no I did not forget about you.

Thanks... and have a nice day.
Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 6/15/2006 07:37:00 PM :: :: 13 Bones Added to the Pile

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Saturday, June 10, 2006

Honoring Thy New Tenant, Landlords, and the Friday Drama Update

So apparently Blogger didn't care for my FOAD to them. Oh well. As punishment I wasn't able to post last night to APODB. So I'm playing a little catch up here so bear with me.

First and foremost I have bidden farewell to the blue grass of Kentucky Gurl in Cali. It was a sad parting as her royal highness was carried out by her servants on her golden throne... kinda like C-3Po when he was carried around by the care bear rejects in Jedi. Of course I did my best to honor her royalness on bended knee... and down the street they carried her off to her Kingdom of Rent-My-Blogalot.

So now I had barely put the neon VACANCY sign on when I had a few people looking for a place to crash. Now I would tell you who they all are... but I can't... why? Because Blogger ate my original post. What I can tell you is that I have another Blogfamous guy staying with me this week... that's right folks I have Utenzi here all week long! Now for those of you who are not in the BE circle, you may not know about Utenzi... and don't let the thumbnail fool you... because he has redone his template (he did it himself by the way) and his posts vary from the great pictures he takes of his graden, to the Stanley Cup Playoffs, to a picture in a national magazine featuring of all people his ex-wife! Now some people may wonder why Utenzi would be staying the week here when we appear to be absolute and complete opposites... well aside from quoting Paula Abdul badly... let's just say that I'm a believer in Yin-Yang theory... so Utenzi is here to balance my ass out! So go see him... like now!

Now also this week I am staying at two very nice places. First I'm staying with Melanie. I first found Melanie's blog, Plaid Toaster, through Monique. Melanie designed her blog. In fact, not only does Melanie continue to design blogs... but she also just did a summer re-design of her own. Guess what? Yep... it's orange!!! My blogging fashion sense is infecting the blogosphere! So go see the re-designed Plaid Toaster!

Also this week I am also sharing some space over at Tales of the Opiated Serpa. Now he isn't any regular Serpa... he's not going to leave me dying at the summit peak or anything like that. He's got some great posts about work, his laziness, and his favorite (non-pro) sports team. So go hear some Tales from the Serpa... I'm there all week too!

Finally I'd like to through a word out there about Matt from MTMD. Matt unfortunately separated his shoulder very severely. I can only realte to this having had to bandage and transport patients with separated shoulders... and let me tell you... they scream their heads off because of the pain. So Matt's been having some people guest post for him since blogging with one hand, let alone on blogger, is really pretty hard. So just stop by MTMD and wish him a speedy recovery!!!

.:*:.

As for the Drama Update... I hate to say it... not really much to report. The biggest thing was that I flipped on The Steff when she told me that she was opening a joint bank account with The Donkey. I lost my mind and damn near drove off the road. Barely a month in and joint bank accounts? I didn't do that with Pudding until we were officially married! I had these visions of her crying on my shoulder about not only her broken heart but the money he had squandered, not that he would, but it was still an image that drove me to verbally barrage her. She immediately told me that they were just thinking about it... and I knew I had scared the shit out of her by my vocal outburst (okay, my screaming and threatening to break his legs)... but it put enough spin onto my day that I was a semi-animal at work.

My snarling and growling forced my immediate boss to have me see a counselor the next day... of course BEFORE work. The counselor, after perusing my file, decided it was time for me to go on medication. As she was writing out the scripts I casually mentioned that I was already prescribed those prescriptions. The question came, "Well do you take them?" to which I honestly answered, "No." So after about 5 minutes of debate of hearing the benefits of prescription meds and so on I walked out. I didn't like how they made me feel when I took them and I don't want to be dependant on meds to make it through the day.

In the end... the stress from work has overtaken any drama in my life... which makes me kinda sad... but at the same time the drama gets intensified and I lash out... so maybe it's better this way. As for the meds... well we'll see how much worse it gets... and how well I can handle it.

On the bright side this weekend is the ECW pay-per-view One Night Stand at the Manhattan Center. I'll be working it as usual... and am looking forward to a night of relaxation seeing Mick Foley, Tommy Dreamer, and other grown men beat each other senseless with an assortment of objects and devices. I am hoping for a run-in chance like the one I did at Summer Slam for Shawn Michaels... but just hanging out will be enough for me.

I'll hopefully be seeing you all on Monday for the standard Ooogle as long as Blogger doesn't crap out again. Have a good weekend.
Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 6/10/2006 12:09:00 AM :: :: 5 Bones Added to the Pile

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Wednesday, June 07, 2006

FOAD Thursday!!! Thank the Heathens!!!

So it is yet another Thursday here at APODB... and I will continue with my Fuck Off And Die participation. Sorry for last week's departure from it... but T was doing an upstanding job entertaining the masses while I played with my pain meds. So my first FOAD goes to all of you who (if there were any?) didn't like T's handiwork last week and were expecting a rant and rave on the ambient fuckery that continues to pervade my world. I do this for me... not you... the fact I entertain is a side benefit for us all.

So my next FOAD would go to... right... my dentist! See yesterday I spent three hours in the chair. Three long, arduous, painful hours being drilled and hammered and impressed upon for my permanaent crowns. I still owe about 1k left on the 15k bill... and so after three hours of TORTURE what kind of pain meds does he give me??? Advil. Over the mofo counter Advil. Oh hello!!! You just spend three hours in my mouth... I already paid you 14k... can't you come up with something a little better??? Like how about some freakin' vicodin!!! Thank goodness I had a few left over from my LAST three hour ordeal with the sadist... and thank goodness that my homey in Risk Management tossed me a percoset. So I was slurring a little today giving out a chest pain... big deal... it got out didn't it?... and I even did it while posting on the forum! I'm a multi-tasking machine baby!!! Call me Windows WD!!! So to my dear loving tooth drilling dentist... FOAD... I'll be done with you soon... then six months of freedom 'til my check-up... 'cause if you think I was sinking this much money into my grill to let it squander... you got another thing coming... and you better rethink about withholding the vicodins... 'cause I'll knock ya da fuck out next time!

So my next FOAD goes out to the moron in Dunkin' Donuts. Once again... I order the same thing everyday. It's a French Vanilla ice coffee, light with cream, and 4 Splendas. This is not rocket science. So when I walk in... and my cheeks are three times the size they are... and I'm talking kinda funny... and I POINT TO THE FUCKING ICE COFFEE ON THE MAT WHAT DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND!!! Thankfully for you your non-english speaking illegal immigrant co-worker has a clue you dumbass fucktard! I hate white boys who think they're above a legal working job. Go graduate high school and maybe you can figure out how to make a decent coffee. FOAD D&D moron!!!

My next FOAD goes to my wonderful little Blogger service. What the hell is happening here guys? Downtime is on the rise. Posts are disappearing. Images are taking a fukton of years to load. I have always been an arduent supporter and defender of the Blogger Way... but today took the cake for me. So here's what I say to you... a big old FOAD to you guys!!! One more unannounced issue and I'm shoppin' round for a new host!

Finally... I have a huge FOAD... one that has been building all week... see Bitter Bitch reviewed a blog over at IT2M here (the second one to be exact)... and Bitter as always came through hugely in this review... but this blog has the AUDACITY to state they are "...on assignment from God to be a good helper to my husband and to train up my children with the Fear and Admonition of the Lord!..." Now this bothered me. In fact I commented at IT2M that it bothers me and the reason is that there were 19 guys (20 but one got busted and is being gang raped by multiple Bubba's in a Virgina Fed Pen as we speak) who had made the same statement, flew 3 planes into 3 buildings and 1 plane into a field in PA, but most importantly changed the lives of millions if not billions of people FOR THE WORSE. This blog so irked me I admit I trafficed it a few times as my rage built.

In addition to the above statement I saw this part that really boiled me more, "I am here to share the Truth to an entire generation trained not to notice and blinded by lies." I did not read one single post in there that was any truer than those that believed on 06.06.06 Satan's son was being born and they waited at maternity ward doors with holy water and crucifix daggers . I don't make it a habit of bashing someone else's beliefs. I think everyone is entitled to believe in whoever or whatever you want as long as it is not propaganda to do harm unto others. I'd even back the Kool-Aid throwing partiers of Jim Jones except for the fact that they involved their children and THAT is doing harm unto others assmunches. Those Heaven's Gate guys were a-okay in my book. So here is what I would like to tell all of you who consider yourselves on an "assignment from God"... take your assigment... crumble it into a nice ball... shine it up real nice... turn it sideways... and STICK IT STRAIGHT UP YOUR CANDY ASSES!!! You want the "truth"... YOU CAN'T HANDLE THE TRUTH (Iknow... I know... but it is SUCH a good ass line)... which is why you cower behind your IDOLS (yes assholes... that crucifix in there is an idol no matter what bs argument you want to make), and your ASSIGNMENTS, and say it is all for "His Glory"!!! Well FOAD glory dick seeking hounds... you wanna do some real saving... go learn some CPR... and keep the souls of your fellow man out of the clutches of the netherworld. Fucktards.

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Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 6/07/2006 11:04:00 PM :: :: 12 Bones Added to the Pile

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Tuesday, June 06, 2006

Wordless Wednesday

I have 3 hours at the dentist scheduled today. Hence why today is a Wordless Wednesday. Here's how I feel about it:
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Maybe if the dentist was cute I'd feel better... but he's in his 50's and smells like garlic. If you want more words go see Kentucky Gurl. If you think I look sad now... wait til she leaves.

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Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 6/06/2006 11:07:00 PM :: :: 2 Bones Added to the Pile

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Monday, June 05, 2006

06.06.06 - Number of the Dog


Today is the sixth day, of the sixth month, of the sixth year. It has been "prophesized" that the numbers 6-6-6 mark that of the Devil or the so called Anti-Christ who will bring about the end of the world. So on this date, to those who consider themselves on "missions from the Lord", he is supposed to be born. A word of warning to pregnant mothers... watch out for nuns, priests, and bible beating zealots standing at the doors of the maternity wards.

So then tonight I was on the phone with The Steff and we were talking about something obliviously retarded like we always do... and somehow "nicknames" came into the subject. I call her Paper... I know... sounds stupid... but there is a long story behind it with a simple explanation... I can read her like one. Then we were talking about Zooted & Polluted, and the Ooompa Loompas.

Then she has this moment of wisdom and says to me, "Ya know... Dog spelled backwards is goD." My favorite English Doctorate bound blondey locks had a revelation! Where does she get this shit from? Oh right... college... a school of "higher" learning. So after a few more minutes of idle chit-chat we conclude Monday night's English language lesson and I start to thinking... which is always a dangerous thing.

Maybe... just maybe... I am the anti-christ? Maybe I am the son of Cool Hand Luke himself... and his roomie Joshua is really a long lost cousin! Wow... but how would I know? I don't see any numbers on me anywhere... but what if it doesn't show up until tomorrow under the light of the full moon?

So I did the next best thing and the ONLY thing any self-respecting evil suspecting blogger would do... I did a meme test. To test this theory... I did a test at a place where everyone from the forums is running to these days... and here's what I discovered:
You Are 100% Evil

You're the most evil person you know.
The devil is even a little scared of you!
Surprised? I'm not... not since I answered the questions honestly and didn't fudge at all. So just to make sure... I took another test to see how bad I really am...

How evil are you?

Now I know I have always had a dark side. I am a strong believer in Yin-Yang theories and the carnal animal within each of us. Well that's 2 for 2 meme's that agree I am Purely 100% Evil which tosses Yang out of my Yin. So was The Steff onto something? Am I going to miraculously transform into Hellspawn at midnight? Well shit... I better get ready.

So I opened up my template and went to a BTOD layout again. I was kinda feeling it... not totally though... so then I decided to declare that 6-6-6 is now the number of the doG. I then declared it my holiday as any good self preserving son of Satan would. In addition I then decided I will use all my credits if need be to Battle any Christian Blog on a Mission from the Lord. Then I found out I have my own church... and it's right here in NYC! Now if that isn't cool, I have my own cheerleading squad of hot little goth girls! Unfortunately... they're in Austin, Texas. But really, no big deal... once I bring about the apocalypse and wipe out the world... well I can have as much oil for gas as I want and I can just drive down there and pick them up!

That's when I realized something. If I bring about the Apocalypse... well then everyone will be dead. That makes my career choice as an EMT a poor one. Damn. This son of Satan thing was sounding pretty cool. So what do I do now?

Well I guess I won't be bringing the Apocalypse... I won't be having my own cheerleading squad of little freaky goths... and I don't have my own church. It is a little disappointing... especially the cheerleader part... but I can get over it real quick. Nothing like sacrificing a chicken on a rotisserie spit with a side of mashed potatoes and corn to take the sting out of losing out on that ego booster.

On the bright side... I can still smack the crap out of the religous zealots right? Oh hell yeah!!!

So while I am off being evil... go visit this angel... she is divine in more way than one.
Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 6/05/2006 11:00:00 PM :: :: 5 Bones Added to the Pile

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Sunday, June 04, 2006

Ooogle Monday



So it is once again Monday... and once again time for you to Ooogle to get that heart pumpin', clear those clots that blogging for the last 7 days has given you, and hopefully give you a reason to shower. Enjoy!

You left your headlights on...


And to keep the harem happy this week...

Arrghhh!  A pirate's life for me!


Have a Happy Monday!!!
Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 6/04/2006 11:01:00 PM :: :: 11 Bones Added to the Pile

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