A Pile of Dog Bones

“In each of us two natures are at war… the good and the evil. All our lives the fight goes on between them, but one of them must conquer. In our own hands lies the power to choose. What we want most to be we are.” – Dr. Henry Jekyll

Thursday, February 08, 2007

It's Thursday And I Got Four Words For Ya...

So today is once again Thursday. It is that lovely day where I take all the things that have pissed me off, gotten on my nerves, crawled under my skin, and screeched the chalkboard with their fingernails... and I tell them, "Hey, I got four words for ya... Fuck Off And Die!" While it may seem juvenile to some... it's a helluva lot cheaper (and safer for me) than therapy.

However before we go onto the tirade... and understand that's exactly what this is especially since I am not working my usual shift but am on an overnight... I need to point out that I have been nominated for an award. Yes, that's right, little old me has been nominated over at the RFS Blog Awards. Now my loyal harem will remember when I first tried to get myself written in over there on their last round for Porn King '06. Afterall... I do give ya'll Ooogle Monday every Monday... but I lost to the Lemur Pimp Mr. Fab. To be honest, I was more miffed over the fact that they wouldn't count my write-in campaign than the actual loss. Add to the fact that awards mean... well... jack shit to me... it really wasn't a big deal. So imagine my surprise when I received the comment that I had been nominated this round!

It turns out that my most beloved blogger thought I would conquer all in the category of... yeah, I almost choked to be honest... Sweetheart of the Blogging World. Yeah... I kid you not. At first I really thought that there had been some heavy duty gourmet oregano usage on her part... but after awhile I can kinda dig it. I mean, c'mon, how many Sweethearts do you know that every Thursday have four words for ya? Right... very few. Now I'll be honest here... my competition is very, very tough. I'm up against another Fab, a Kept Woman, the Organizer Herself, and of course they had to throw in the ONLY other blogger who probably has Four Words for Y'All... and not just on Thursdays. Yeah. I'm definitely the underdog. I'll talk more about this tomorrow with my picks for the other categories, unless I have something else important to say, but I just want it out there that yeah, I got nominated... so keep me in mind.

Now on to be therapized...

To my dear animal rights activists who protested Groundhog's Day... FOAD. Those Groundhogs have THE LIFE! They really do. So for you to protest their "captivity" for "entertainment" purposes, well you really need to get laid and loosen the fuck up. I love me Groundhog's Day and they don't need saving. Why don't you go save the Turkey from Thanksgiving. If any American animal holiday icon needs your help, it's that one.

To the dear little snob bitch at the mall the other day... I will admit my appearance may not be as upscale as some of your other clientèle, seeing as how I actually WORK for a living. I will admit that maybe leaning on the glass counter was not proper etiquette. However, for you to come out of your face and tell me that the watches in that case were "probably" out of my price range was totally un-mother-fucking-called for. Which is exactly why after you pissed me off, I bought two from the other associate working the counter with you. In cash. FOAD dumb stereotyping bitch.

To idiots armed with Nextels... FOAD. It is really simple... I put out a schedule every Friday for the following week. Generally, if I am on the schedule for a 7:00am shift, why would you chirp me at midnight? For those of you who don't use Nextel, if you just press the button and release it without talking it "chirps" the other person so they know you are calling. I hate that. I hate that with a passion. So when you chirp me at midnight, and I'm due in at 7, which means I'm up at 5, is it really wise to then PISS ME OFF MORE by asking me the stupidest question that was already told to you 50 gazillion times? The answer is no. Hence why I am now working your tour... and your not. I hope you like that dip in the paycheck idiot.

Quick shot FOADs to YouTube for not allowing me more than 10 minutes to spew about cereal, BlogExplosion for still not allowing me to do BOTB even though my trouble ticket is 3 weeks old, and to Vermont Teddy Bear who does not allow for scheduled delivery but instead you need to time your order to coincide with the holiday. They are all plotting against me... and no... I'm not paranoid.

Finally, it is time to show some Peace and Love to a brood of nitwits that reside here in the blogosphere. It started this past weekend over at the blogosphere's official Hotbed of Controversy. So there's a new "review site" out there for blogs... called So Many Blogs, So Little Time... and yes I am linking them because I know you're all lazy. It turns out that they basically are another rag-tag group of phonies who copied IT2M in everything from the cartoon avatars, to calling themselves bitches, to literally the IT2M TOS verbatim. Real fucking original. I hate that to begin with, because I find it to be the absolute WORST offense committable by a blogger, which is something I hold over from the writer in me, but whatever. That's not why they are being shown Peace and Love.

So you know... Monday was slow for me... and for whatever reason the rest of the sphere was eerily quiet... so I left a comment. They deleted it. I left another one. Then they deleted the post I left it on. Then they made another post, referencing my comment they had deleted. So I left another comment. They deleted that one too. So I did it again. Finally they came back and tried to get all snarky and bitchy with me. The thing is... it felt mad familiar... and mad old. So I tend to think they researched people who have snarked or bitched at me and probably copied it. So now... what do I hate more than Frosted Flakes? Yep... comment and post deleters. So to the wanna be blog review tyrant whores with the un-original ideas and concepts... Peace and Love...
... and that's Doggy Style baby!!!

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Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 2/08/2007 01:05:00 AM :: :: 8 Bones Added to the Pile

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