Friday, October 13, 2006

The Blood Has Been Spilt... Happy Friday The 13th

Did you really think the Halloween season was going to come and go without a template change? Foolish blog readers... orange is for the innocent and pure of heart.

So for the remainder of the month, whereas APODB stood for A Pile Of Dog Bones it will now stand for A Pool Of Dog's Blood. Slightly gorecentric, and nowhere nearly as professionally done as KG or Newsbitch, but it has been slightly tweaked to not only a new color but also rotating header images.

In honor of today being Friday The Thirteenth I have decided to list 13 Gruesome Facts About Me...

1) I eat cold White Castle Cheeseburgers at 5:00am after waking up without a second thought
2) I use cans as ashtrays and sometimes... forget which ones
3) I hate shaving... and sometimes go a full 8 days without doing so
4) I don't eat enough fiber... hence sometimes the people in the bathroom after me will see "floaters"
5) I keep bottles of opened soda that's been half drunk in the back of my truck... and have no problem finishing them months later when I'm thirsty
6) I have a complete collection of serial killer trading cards
7) I have a photo album full of nasty dead people and crime scenes I've been to
8) I have another photo album with graves of dead people I may not necessarily know... but I thought they were cool
9) I wore the same clothes for 6 days straight last September... and had to burn them
10) In my younger days as a Goth I would eat dead rose pedals sprinkled on pizza... and tell people it was Oregano
11) I haven't walked onto a scene wearing latex gloves since 2001, even on patients I know to be HIV positive... most people consider it inviting a death sentence... I consider it showing my human side
12) When I was in New Orleans... I stuck my hand into the water... and I'm still waiting for it to fall off
13) I might have mentioned this... but everyone in EMS has a "weakness". I have walked through crime scenes where the walls were painted in blood, been in apartments filled with human and animal feces, been covered in vomit, been pissed on, been spat on (which just PISSES me off), crawled through the NYC sewers and subways... but my weakness I discovered one day was women... with facial hair. A girl who from behind was beautiful turned around to me and had a goatee... and I covered her in projectile vomit. I had eaten Wendy's chile that day

So there it is... 13 Gruesome Facts About Me. There will be some other gruesome things... and just wait until the ACTUAL holiday... it'll gore you away. Promise.


Today is still Friday so I need to honor my dark templated tenant, RockyJay. I have to tell you something about RockyJay... he has in more ways been an inspiration to me than most. He is one of the few male bloggers that I can read and know I'm walking away with a smile. Go see RockyJay and become enamored.

I didn't stay anywhere this week... and neither did My Eyes... there is really only ONE blog I want to rent from just so I can say that I was there... but everytime I try to rent they aren't up for bid or they already have someone. One day... one day I'll get there. Maybe then I'll quit this renting thing. I stress the word maybe.


Today is also the day for the drama update. Well I still haven't been my social butterfly self... but it seems The Nick has moved on to yet another new guy. She officially has been ditched by Mel as the baby's godmother... which is probably a good thing since she'd probably miss the baptism... and she apparently has found another part time job. How she expects to balance her regular job, the part time job, and the 29 gazillion "friends" she has is totally beyond me.

Ooompa Loompa #1 is still in school going after that white patch. She's a traitor to the kind, but she's a cute one so I can let it slide. Ooompa Loompa #2 finally came out of the woodwork the other night. We really didn't get into anything specific... nor did I really want to. There's only so much flirting I can put up with before it gets old and played.

As for The Steff, we were on the phone last night talking about Halloween costumes. She wanted to be a sexy Dorothy from The Wizard of Oz. I wasn't feeling it. We checked out some new bunny costumes she could get. She did complain that The Donkey was being a slug about it. She had a great idea to go as a bunny and he could go as The Heff, but he apparently wasn't feeling it and wanted to go as one of the evil flying monkeys from TWoZ. So yeah... he's becoming a little more like Officer Crumb with each passing day. I don't know if The Steff sees it yet... I just hope we can get past the holidays before it goes critical mass. I think he and I will need to have a discussion.

Finally, Christine called me today while I was working. We talked about the whole thing that happened Wednesday. She had a unique perspective on it... and something I hadn't taken into account. Her view of it is that they needed me there for one reason and one reason only... because they have no idea what to do. So I suppose I should postpone my trip to Shady Acres where I can graze with everyone else who has been put out to pasture. Of course in an effort to save my ass from waking up mad early to find a date at the America's Hottest Mom Audition Saturday I asked her to go with me to the dinner. Of course she then also reminded me that she is still married. Damn. Well at least I asked.

Thus wraps up another Friday's Tenant and Landlord Honors and the Drama Update... with a little gruel thrown in for good measure on such an auspicous occasion.
Posted by New York City's Watchdog :: 10/13/2006 11:13:00 AM :: Permalink :: 7 Bones Added to the Pile

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